After reflecting on a dream I had about Winnie The Pooh I wanted to make a sort of “Top 10 of 2015” list like everyone else is doing. Instead of listing the same 20 or so things that everyone else is being much more insightful than I am about, I decided to list things that made me weep in 2015.
Disclaimer: I cry a lot. I don’t know why but especially if I’m alone I tend to get very emotional and sometimes it doesn’t even make sense. It took me until recently to properly come to terms with that as an aspect of who I am and since then it’s been perpetually on my mind. It really adds an extra level of enjoyment if something I experience brings me to that emotional level.
Note that I included “Dumb” in the title of this so as not to touch on genuinely tragic or sad things that happened in 2015. I really don’t want to try and add anything to events like these and enough has been said by everyone else. That said, on with the list:
1. This Picture of Kanye West:
Kanye west has a look he reserves only for the things he loves the most pic.twitter.com/bsfpDzqJhh
— #fatima (@fatiiimag) April 22, 2015
So it’s 3am, I’m on twitter (naturally) and come across this image. I take a quick glance and expel air from my nose in lieu of laughing. But then something hits me. I really can’t properly explain this one but I well up and start crying. Kanye West is a person I love very much and his various arts have influenced and inspired me to no end. Here is this person I idolise hanging out with his kid and eating an ice cream. He’s being a completely normal person with no extravagant needs. He’s a father and an ice cream lover and we are all one and the same deep down. It struck me as magical that someone who I respect and hold on such a high pedestal enjoys the simple pleasures life has to offer as much as the rest of us.
Yeah it’s dumb I know, shut up.
2. The Beginner’s Guide
The beginner’s guide is an excellent video game but it’s story really, really got to me.
Without wishing to spoil it, TBG is about being a creative person trying to make things. It’s also about needing approval and praise in order to justify making said things. TBG and by proxy it’s creator Davey Wreden spoke to me and resonated with me in a damning way. I read a post on Davey’s blog where he talks about this need for approval and how it impacted his life and I remember reading it and thinking “oh boy I hope that’s not how I think as well”. Playing TBG was like a wake up call. I absolutely am this person and I risk encountering the same problems that Davey did if I don’t take action ASAP. This realisation and subsequent fear made me weep like a child. It was pretty harsh but it was the wake up call I needed. Thanks Davey 😀
3. The Bob Ross Twitch Stream
Bob Ross is a gentle granddad for us all and his soft voice carried me through the final weeks of the game project I did for university this year. At a few points in his episodes I was brought to tears by his sweet, calm voice dispensing little snippets of mindful advice. I love Bob in the same way that I love Fred Rodgers, they are both immensely nice people who unconditionally love others with ease. Bob and Fred are people who make the world a better place just by existing and listening to him talk on his TV show is mystical. The child inside me thinks he’s talking directly to me and telling me that it will all be OK, and that will bring me to tears every time.
4. Steven Universe (a lot of times)
Yeah I’m pretty sick of me talking about this too. If you haven’t watched it yet that’s fine not all of us are perfect but if you don’t like it you’re a monster and never talk to me again.
This show made me cry more times than I can count and I have said enough about how great it is so just enjoy this heart warming video from the creators (no spoilers)
Games like Undertale give me hope and remind me that games are worth all the effort I and so many others give them. Undertale is mostly the work of one person, Toby Fox, and is an excellent showcase of good game design, great musical composition, strong visual achievement and heart-wrenching storytelling.
I really don’t want to spoil it so I’ll just say if you care about video games at all give it a go. it takes about 6 hours to get through and it is absolutely worth every second. Especially try it if you like Pokemon, Mother/Earthbound, Final Fantasy, jokes about skeletons, old LucasArts adventure games and jokes about spaghetti.
As for the whole crying thing, the end of this game really hit me hard. The themes of friendship and caring about people even if they appear to be evil really spoke to me. Undertale challenges you to open up emotionally and become vulnerable and in doing so brought me to tears.
So that was my year in crying at things. There were more but 5 is a nice number and I need to emotionally recover from remembering them all. Hope you all had a great year and let’s continue weeping into 2016!